Am I changing?
Metamorphosing from caterpillar to a butterfly?
I often feel the world runs too fast for my pace. Like I am a snail trying to keep up with a leopard. And then I ponder, why can’t I take leisure in my pace. Definitely, the leopard and I don’t have a common destination in our minds. I have stopped speculating over the would be’s. At this moment, I have ample reasons to smile. And I find that enough. Nerves being nerves always act crazy, however, there is something different in my stride. Like it has found a way to walk on. The “rasta” so we speak is foggy, full of pebbles and stones, each turn bringing a new surprise. I still like walking on it though. Let’s see where it takes me.
P.S. rasta is hindi equivalent to path.
If a person is taking their guard down, sincerely making an effort to see you happy, expressing their fears and insecurities in moments of doubt; When you know it is not going to be just pink and peaches but also sombre shades of grey on some days. When you secretly feel universe has conspired and made you stumble across each other’s path. Even after all that has been done and dusted, when someone manages to bring a smile on your face. When they hug you and are in no rush to let go. When you are too happy and scared at the same time because nothing lasts forever. What do you do? Do you take the plunge?
Have I found my missing piece of puzzle?
There is devil; there is the deep blue sea; and then there’s you. You came attached with a pre-written warning. Each meeting as uncertain as the next rainfall. Each word spoken to you with a sense of trepidation. Each glare aching to stay. Every moment gone by, yearning to be etched. Every touch emanating a spark; each spark begging not to die. The sparks on which books are written. Too many words spoken, yet emotions left unsaid. A story too short to begin, too close to share, too certain of its end. Doesn’t make it any less worthwhile.
This guy I know, from not so long, got me half a cake on my half birthday!
Talk about sugary sweet surprises…I am all smiles today.
Eleanor was right. She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something. – Rainbow Rowell
Retracing back to the good old habit of reading, with Eleanor & Park.
It is endearing.
The heat is soaring here in Bangalore and the weather occupies too much of my mind to be thinking about anything else. That persistent craving to go take another bath, the no ends tan, the discomfort in clothing…all regular hot weather grievances. Although, one thing I absolutely adore about the summer season: Mangoes! I patiently wait for this time of the year when I can relish these sweet little things in all their glorified forms: milkshakes, fruit slices, ice-creams, you name it. Immense love out there. So much so that I am posting about mangoes here. Not a food fanatic but yeah, this fruit fanatic!
Apart from this, life is going good. Living it, one day at a time. Not much contemplation; not much of trepidation. Finding ways to smile in little things. Accepting the way certain people are, not letting it space out my peace of mind.
P.S. This weekend’s highlight was watching SRK’s movie FAN, which I read a lot about, also loved; and then me buying mangoes and eating them and going crazy over them.
Monday, sure, Welcome!
I woke up today with a very specific and probably positive thought in mind: Make it count. The day. I wasn’t pretty sure on what would actually make it count. For me, mostly, a day well spent has been to be with family or friends or anybody you love. That’s my idea of “time utilization”. Lately, I have had a lot of time to myself. My friends are occupied, my family stays away etc. etc. A LOT of me time. That bug in my mind has been running hard from days to figure out, what now? I will not talk about any bigger plans here. I am pretty lost if I dig deep. Nevertheless, I woke up, I pondered a while, realized it is plain shit to sit and ponder, I cooked, I danced by myself for sometime, I picked my guitar to practise, I cleaned up my room a bit, that’s pretty much it. Did I make it count? That bug inside keeps appeasing me, calm down, keep going. I will just listen to my bug.
PS: We had a day off here, Republic Day in India.