Lahe Lahe

Time flies by when you are happy. A very true statement by some anonymous guy who quoted it. What do I do? Recollect every beautiful moment spent in the past few months and pen it down? Mind does a quick retort: let it be. So I try not to run amok backwards. Keep myself focussed on the now.

Another itching fact about time is, it never stops. Keeps running so darn unaffectedly. Everyday, you are changing, people around you are changing, molecules colliding, chemical reactions happening, drama, frenzy, doldrums, emotions. When I can barely control the miniscule event of a leaf accidentally crackling under my foot, why bother controlling humans, their actions or the consequences there on?!

Lahe Lahe..this is an Assamese phrase I got to know from a recent trip to the North East part of India. What it means is,  to take it easy! Stay unhurried. One of the many lovely things I am taking back from the place.

Belated New year wishes to all! 🙂 I’ll be around.

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1.12.2015

Ah! Another December. Aren’t they intense? And aren’t they inexplicably beautiful, in thought and sight? Don’t they make you put your thinking caps on? Winters suddenly feel chillier. And you sit and start looking back at the year gone by. How it changed you. How you evolved into something different. Last heard, this time of the year, you were some version of yours and now you have upgraded to xyz.2015.1.0. You met new people, got into new jobs, went through some break ups, gained some pounds, lost some pounds, travelled new lands, created new memories. Now, as December heralds, there is this urgency in my head, that the moments I have lived shouldn’t fade. Where do I store them? How do I remember them all? The year-end is coming close and it feels like something is escaping my hands too. Wish I could make a movie of it all and save in my hard disk as I do with other good stuff I find online. Is this why they say every beautiful thing comes to an end? And every end is a new beginning?

Dear December, I want to hold you close and not let go. But as we don’t have that option, let me embrace you in all your flavours and cherish your charm, till it lasts.

Voluntary Indiscretions

We lived a moment of sheer joy. There was peace, there was ecstasy. There was fire, there was warmth. Your arms were a safe haven for me. My frailty did good to your virility. Yes, it was almost picture perfect. Now, you want to talk about it? I say, don’t ruin it for me. Why kill something by stretching it too far. Moments are not a ductile tape. Let them be intact. Let’s not defame it from our words, our logical reasonings, our shallow promises, our moral compasses. I can’t stand you falsely wanting for me and pretension is not my forte. Let’s take a place in each other’s memory and move ahead. You need to understand, we are not Romeo and Juliet. We are only some transitory outcomes of our impulsive indiscretions. Brutal but true.

Reliving tidbits

Sometimes when you have lived through something beautiful, been a subset of a surreal experience: you have laughed so hard, your stomach hurt; you have sighed so sad, the cloud drizzled; danced so long, your body clamoured for rest; have kissed so strong, your mouth resisted tasting anything else; dressed so sassy, the crowd steered their eyes on you; sometimes when you are in between those moments, you want to instantly save them somehow. You take a picture, you make a note, you write a poem, you just want to get hold of it. Does it really work? I suppose not.

May be you couldn’t click it in your camera, may be what you wrote couldn’t describe the enormity of it. May be your awesomest kiss got lost somewhere in between. May be it is not possible after all to relive these things to bits and pieces again. But, you were there. You savoured it in entirety. You still remember the feeling, don’t you? Past might get hazy, but it never vanishes.

I read this on a hoarding while returning from my Goa trip today: They shared one moment and lived it thousand times in their memories.
About this post: Could be an outcome of my inability to give a detailed description about my past few days, and some other stuff. I will though.

Another one bites the dust

AT LEAST that’s what I say when I have these series of boyfriends/flings coming and going around; you know to add some humour to it. Some due to my issues; some due to their short comings; some for no substantial reason at all(!). Love is a precarious bait. Despite all the risks involved of getting your heart sullied, you do it any way. There will be breathtaking moments galore and the beauty of it all, gets you carried away.

Who doesn’t love being nudged or nuzzled or lifted and dragged on to the wall?! Who won’t smile if someone says they want to eat you up? 😀 I know I do. It’s not done in heat of the moment, and it is certainly not an impulsive decision to make. The heart and mind sit together for several conference calls and land up here. Oh the risks! will mitigate them. And the differences? Will adjust. Difficulties? Will face them, will beat them. If you like someone, you like someone. Everything else becomes surmountable. And then the story ends like every other beautiful one. No reason or rhyme, it just ends. As abruptly as it’s happening here.

This one is going to take time. To turn from fresh scar to a wound. To be reminded of you and not mention it. To crave for you and let it pass like I was some kid and you an expensive toy. I can say I had it coming, people may say it wasn’t going to last long anyway. I’ll get over it and all of that crap. But I had witnessed magic there; I was one element of our heavily reactive chemistry. Some pieces of puzzle fit right together. We so did. And past we will become, but an utterly beautiful one.  You there, made me laugh and I’ll hold that close to my heart. Adios then, is it?

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You Float baby!

Say you are drowning…but you have a life jacket on…so, hypothetically you are drowning(only in your head)…you are filled with consternation and you start moving your hands and feet in all directions..impatient..restless..scared..looking for something to hang on..something to hold on to. What do you find? That it is only worsening your situation. Water is buzzing in through your nose and ears. Then something hits you..you spread your arms and just set free..thinking let me try this too, how worse could it get! That is when miracle happens and suddenly you are floating in peace, gazing at the clear sky..hearing the birds chirp…taking in the greenery around you.

This was one of my rafting experiences but how easily could one relate it to life!
Why don’t we just stop panicking and let loose?